__ Thursday, January 13, 2005 ;
Here's something by stanrick.... Something he told me long ago, further reemphasized few days ago....
HIM: " For relationships, 1st year is usually the most important and most difficult.. why? Coz, it should be during this time that both couples be open to each other, know each others' faults/habits/problems, trash out those that you dont like... quarrel and argue till you're satisfied that that is what u can accept in future.. in other words, talk out everything u dont like.. be yourself.. dont hide... after the first year, since all these are already out, for the rest of the years, its for u to strengthen ur bonds and relationships...."
Paused for a few minutes.. we looked at each other....
HIM AGAIN: " You know why is it that some people can be together for 3 years, 4 years or 7 years and then later say that they are not suitable for each other, what dont like their faults or problems etc... its becoz for the 1st year, they are still at their honey moon period where they try to hide themselves... all those bad habits, faults, they tried to hide it from their partners and make their relationship perfect... maybe becoz they are just too afraid of losing the other partner that they dont want to be themself or becoz they want to impress their partners... however, all of u know that once there's faults/problems/bad habits with that someone, its hard to totally get rid off... maybe u can disguise it, but not kick it away.. eventually, when they feel that the relationship is stable, they will gradually show out all these problems... it is then that real problems occur... their time to then go through wat should have been gone through in the 1st year.... lets say these problems occur only in the 3rd year where it should be in the 1st year, and ultimately u realise that you cant stand it and wants to break off, it will mean that u have wasted the 3 years for nothing when u can actually only waste like 1 year plus? "
When there is problem or something u dont like abt the other person, i feel that you should just say it out or tell him/her... dont endure or tolerate in hope that they will change.. eventually, it will drag and drag till a point where nothing said can help the situation..... trash everything out, tell him/her what u really think... dont say ok if its not ok.... make sure everything is really ok, no bad feelings, then u say ok.... i believe that u should talk through every problems.. dont just sleep it off or forget it or act blur.. ultimately, the same problem will arise again, given some period of time.... then its like dragging....
SO, jiehui.... u should let keming know everything... just trash everything out with him... otherwise, he wont know what he's facing... guys are just purely too stupid and by the time they figure it out themselves, its usually too late.. the girls has already suffered injustice for a long time.... If he really loves u and wants to be with u... he will change whatever u dont like for u... what u have to do is ask him if he wants to change.. and give him time.... Sometimes, pure forgetting is not the way in life.... i'm sure u will meet with the same problem again and again in future if u do not solve things now.... u must jiayou.. coz i know u treasure this relationship alot... i really hope u and keming can work out.. coz, its like partly i'm the one getting the two of u together.... JIAYOU!!
Snow *
Has Stopped11:00 PM ;
